How to improve your situation if you're being excluded...

It happens all the time; people being excluded from groups. Sometimes you can't do anything about it, but in a class things can easily become very frustrating and depressing. Although a positive mindset and attitude are mostly all that matter, being one with a group is hard as can be, but there are a few little things that you might (not) want to do, in order to connect and make friends.

The most important aspect of all in trying to connect to a group is the social one, since your behaviour here shows how you feel and how you interact with others. Mostly the behaviour we show, we show subconsciously, so the message that we send might not always be intended, but to show you care, it is of importance that you clearly demonstrate this.

Smile

Although this seems as if it doesn't matter, smiling is a very common and neutral way to show that you like someone and just are happy. People neglecting to smile might come across as cold-hearted and unfriendly, which is why you should smile more!

Put away your phone

It has been proven that if you are playing with your phone, it seems you are less approachable, thus scaring off people that might want to engage. When you put your phone away you show people you are open and social, instead of rather introverted.

Be calm

In some cases, you might think that you don't stand out like the others do, which can cause you to act up in some situations. Although it sometimes seems like a good idea, other classmates can easily get irritated and might quickly think of you no other way. To ensure that you stay yourself, try to be calm and kind in class, instead of resorting to other attitudes that might only seem appealing to your classmates.

Put others before yourself

Not in the big way, but just keep a couple of things in mind when talking to other people. Ask them how they are, first, don't keep on talking about your holiday plans, or don't assume that they will do anything for you, because you simply can't or don't have time: put your effort into getting to know them.

Connect the dots

Find links between the group and you, if it is a book your read, a movie you saw, or a language you speak. Are there subjects which you and other classmates excel at, but others are struggling in? Maybe tutoring can bring you closer. Try to connect via personal or school life; this might give you an in of the group you seek.

Don't try too hard

Although it seems like an irrelevant aspect, the amount you're trying to connect to people really matters, since if you want too much in too little time, people feel pushed, while if you barely show anything involving the matter, they don't know you even want to be included. Besides that, it might even get a lot harder on yourself, too: people don't too often want to be around people who push.

Be careful how you behave on social media

Every student will have some part in social media, if it's Instagram, Snapchat, or Pinterest, it doesn't matter, but in an age of putting your life on the internet, how you portray yourself does matter, since it is just part of your portfolio. If you're being excluded, don't start to copy the people who you want to hang out with: they might think you're not in the place to decide that.

Be yourself

Very cliché, but the best advise there is! Be the best possible version of yourself in which you can approach and get along with anybody, even if you don't sincerely like them. Find your strengths and your confidence and I hope you'll soon be included!